5.23.2012

First and Last and the Giant Head

Yes, those are the same exact shoes, just a different size. As long as they keep making them, I'll keep buying them.
Despite slamming the door into his head when I dropped him off for school on Monday, Merrick survived his first year of school. My only question is why school has to end. Who invented summer break? Clearly someone who didn't have kids. At least someone with kids was smart enough to invent summer camp.

Sorry, I just was trying to divert attention away from my stellar parenting moment when I attacked Merrick's head with a giant chunk of metal. It was one of those rare moments where I miscalculated the rate of speed to which he was exiting the truck.

It was also one of those special moments of motherhood where my first thought was to look for blood and my second thought was to see if any of the other moms in the parking lot saw my smooth moves. Sure, my kid was crying and I was compressing his head into my stomach as hard as I could. But I was also looking over my shoulder to see if there were any witnesses.

There was and she was so kind as to stop and call CPS see if he was OK while giving me dirty looks looking concerned. She had one of those minivans with the automatic doors that would never close on a child's fingers or head, so I'm sure she mumbled some dirty comments under her breath about my choice to drive a SUV with giant, manually slamming doors.

As I was explaining the situation to his teacher, she could only comfort me by telling me she once slammed her child's fingers in the door while getting out of the car at the pediatrician's office. It helped.

Despite a bump on his head, Merrick has yet to bring up the incident again. And knowing him, he will randomly bring it up 6 months from now at the most inopportune time. Perhaps in front of a police officer during a safety fair or a social worker we happen to be sitting next to on an airplane.

So the first year of school is done and at least 18 more to go! Now to survive the all-school picnic with all the cute 20-something moms from our class. I'd look that young, too, if I wasn't older than you!

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